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lyrics

BABY VELOCIRAPTOR 1
My daddy says I'm a miracle!

BABY VELOCIRAPTOR 2
My daddy says I'm his special little guy!

BABY VELOCIRAPTOR 3
I’m made of science

BABY VELOCIRAPTOR 4
And I am a clone

ALL BABY VELOCIRAPTORS
They say I'm a breakthrough sent down from the sky

GENNARO
The investors say that they’re getting very concerned,
They want an on­site inspection.
You have to convince me in forty eight hours.
Or they’ll pull your funding
And, you’ll, be, done!

ALL BABY VELOCIRAPTORS
Their science says I'm a miracle,
One look at my face, and it's plain to see.
Ever since the day we hatched from artificial eggs,
It's been plain we’re a change for paleontology!

GENNARO
Please understand this won’t be a fun vacation,
How’s the stability of the park?
The investors told ya,
The risk is on their shoulders,
They’ve sent me as their lawyer
And I’ll shut you down!

MULDOON
One can hardly move for showoffs in science these days.
It seems that they’re making dozens of these worth­ multi­millions these days
"Safety" seems de rigueur.
I tell them carnivores are carnivores;
(aside) GO SHOOT HER,
Is it is some modern miracle of genetics,
That such vicious miracles don't scare them... the staff’s full of heretics.

GENNARO, ARNOLD, WU
John Hammond says it’s a miracle,
They’ll look at the park, and we’ll all soon see.
Ever since the day InGen thought that they should play God,
It's been clear they’ve no fear and, well, I don’t quite agree!

ARNOLD
The day they said that they made velociraptors...
I had never seen a live velociraptor
I know if we quit, they’ll just go hire some real twits,
But those velociraptors, don’t make me feel safe!

DODGSON
Don’t make eye contact, Nedry be real quiet and we’ll have a chat...

NEDRY
The role of secret agent here portrayed with such convincing hat.

DODGSON
God’s sake, Dennis, you’re a menace!

NEDRY
Real nice third class disguise, Dodgson

DODGSON
No names Nedry; use some caution!

NEDRY
We’ve got Dodgson

DODGSON
Nedry, come on!

NEDRY
Have you seen how no one cares? This has been fun, but let’s prepare.

DODGSON
Fine.

NEDRY
I’ll get your embryos, you get my million and we’re square.

DODGSON
Just please be useful.

NEDRY
I’ve got the coolant and­

DODGSON
It’s crucial.

NEDRY
Could you be a little calmer for my sake? It’s gonna be a piece of cake!

GRANT
Their evolution’s a miracle
One look at their bones, and it's plain to see.
Ever since the day they lived, the cretaceous per’iod,
It's been clear there's no peer for a predator like these!
But even though they’re a miracle
Our needed funding isn’t coming though it’s critical.

ELLIE
You can be all cynical, but it's a truth empirical.
I know there’ll be a miracle, a miracle, that we couldn’t foresee!

HAMMOND
Dr. Grant, your passion for your work restores my faith in scientists.

Each new dig site, a canvas yet unpainted
This undiscovered world
Fossilized violence
Every life is unbelievably unlikely.
The chance of evolution,
Almost infinitely small.
When I tell you this, you’ll need champagne,

I admire your restraint,
Pal’eontology’s a miracle! Miracle!

ELLIE, GRANT
We just have things booked up until the next quarter.
And the other scientists won’t understand.
Busier than you know about,
We wish that we could help you out

GRANT
With your theme park

ELLIE
Consulting...

GRANT
This is just crossing a line!

ELLIE
Well it’s just our busy time, that’s all

HAMMOND
Miracle, miracle, a miracle; you’ll see it’s a miracle,
Come with me, then you’ll see, soon it will make sense...
You know, we’ve spared no expense

(spoken) How about I fund your dig for a further three years?

GENNARO
Approval from us is unbelievably unlikely.

DODGSON
The chances of success are, almost infinitely small.

ELLIE
I guess we’ll be booking off some time!

HAMMOND
And still every single strand, every breakthrough is a miracle! Miracle! Miracle!

ALL
Everyone says it’s a miracle
One look at the facts, and it's plain to see.
Ever since the day InGen thought that they should play God,
It's been plain there's a change for paleontology!

John Hammond says it’s a miracle
That they’re breaking science rules just like the Berlin Wall.
You can’t be all cynical, ‘cause it's a truth empirical.
This will be a miracle, a miracle, in paleontolo ...!

MALCOLM (spoken)
So you two dig up dinosaurs?

ALL
Gy!

credits

from Jurassic Parody: The Musical Cast Recording, released November 17, 2015

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Geekenders Vancouver, British Columbia

Geekenders creates geeky theatre and events in Vancouver, BC

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